


Sickness and the lack of coherent thoughts

by DrarryMalecSolangelo



Series: Sanders Sides One Shots [10]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Kinda, Multi, Sickfic, there's not much to say, they're just idiots and they can't manage a single coherent thought in between all of them, tsus challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 09:14:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29293509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrarryMalecSolangelo/pseuds/DrarryMalecSolangelo
Summary: Roman's sick, Janus and Virgil are worried, they're all idiots.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Deceit | Janus Sanders
Series: Sanders Sides One Shots [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2011990
Comments: 13
Kudos: 35





	Sickness and the lack of coherent thoughts

**Author's Note:**

> TW: swearing, food, and sex mention (because Remus is here), but that’s all I can think of. If you’d like me to tag something else, just let me know!
> 
> This fic was made with help from @dramaticsnakes and @emy-loves-you (on tumblr)!

"Roman's sick," Logan said. He might've continued talking, Virgil really wouldn't know. His mind had stopped working after those two simple words had been uttered, and everything after them got drowned out.

And then his mind started working again. Frantically.

"Roman's what?"

Logan stopped talking in surprise, cut off mid-sentence. “He’s sick,” he repeated.

Virgil’s forehead creased in concern. Why had no one told him? How was he? And-

“Does he need anything?”

Virgil had meant to ask that, but someone else had beat him to it. Janus.

“He just has the flu,” Logan said, raising an eyebrow at both men’s behavior. He adjusted his glasses in a nervous tick as he felt the burning gaze of both of them stay fixed on him even after saying that. He looked away as he amended his mistake. “Well, I guess he could use some company, and some soup. Although there’s no scientific explanation as to how those help, they have been proven to-” he stopped talking again once he looked back to the other sides- or to where they had previously been. They were long gone.

Logan sighed and shook his head.

Virgil and Janus had both darted out as soon as Logan had finished saying what Roman would need, uninterested in the explanation behind it and way too interested in getting said soup to Roman. 

Five minutes later, Virgil knocked on Roman’s door.

There were some hushed whispers until a muffled “Come in!” was heard.

Carefully as to not accidentally drop the soup, Virgil opened the door and stepped into the room. Only to find himself unexpectedly falling.

He yelped as the soup started leaking, but suddenly someone else grabbed both him and the plate, not allowing a single drop to fall off it and holding him steady by the waist.

“Here, Roman. You need it.”

Janus. Of course.

He had subtly made Virgil stumble and grabbed his waist and the plate- he had enough hands to manage it. And then he had handed it to Roman in his place. 

Of course that asshole would try to make him look clumsy in front of his crush. Because Roman was also Janus’ crush. And Janus was an asshole.

Roman watched with fascination shining in his eyes as these events transpired.

“You both work so well together!” he commented, happily receiving the soup. “Thank you.”

Virgil’s eye twitched. “We do, yeah.”

Janus smirked. “Indeed.”

They stayed in uncomfortable silence as Roman drank his soup, although not all the occupants of the room noticed it was uncomfortable.

As the sick side finished his soup, though, he shivered. It was barely noticeable, but Virgil and Janus were both alert and so they picked up on it.

Virgil stopped slouching and hurried to ask, “Are you cold, Princey?”

But Roman didn’t even have the time to reply, as Janus reentered the room at that moment- when had he even left?- and carefully tucked Roman in with the blanket he brought. Roman relaxed under it, which proved that he had, in fact, been feeling cold. His cheeks also took a red tint, but it was clear to everyone that it had nothing to do with the blanket and more with the person tucking him in with it.

Janus turned to look at Virgil and smiled smugly. The other side narrowed his eyes and smirked.

“Oh, Janus, how nice of you to bring Roman my blanket! Since  _ I  _ was the one who made it, I know how soft and warm it is. I appreciate you being so considerate of our prince’s needs.”

Janus’ smile wavered as he noticed that the blanket was, indeed, Virgil’s. 

“You made it?” Roman asked with curiosity. Both sides turned to look at him as if, in their rivalry, they had forgotten Roman was even there.

Anxiety blushed as he stared at Roman, his crush, cuddling his blanket. “Well, yeah.”

Roman grinned brightly, his cheeks darkening just the slightest bit further. “It’s so nice! A prince deserves royal blankets. This one meets the requirements.”

Virgil uselessly fumbled for words.

“And thank you too, Janus, for being such a gentleman.”

Janus' human side of his face turned a bright shade of red. 

No eloquence or fast-paced mind helped them there. The blushing gays could not form a single coherent thought in between all three of them.

“I- I’m going to the bathroom,” Roman managed weakly.

Virgil nodded his understanding, too flustered to speak, and Janus simply moved out of the way, refusing to meet their eyes, though everyone had seen his blush by then.

As soon as Roman was out of sight, Virgil darted across the room towards a relatively calm Janus. 

“What do you think you’re doing?” he asked, miffed.

“Why, Virgil, I’m taking care of Roman, of course.” He smirked.

Virgil took a step forward, shoving his pointer finger to Janus’ chest. “No, you’re only getting in the way. You need to leave.”

Janus, in an unexpected turn of events, grabbed his wrist and held it against the wall, immobilizing him. “No, Virgil,” he smirked, “I am  _ not _ leaving.”

Virgil glared. Janus made no move to free him, so he started biting his lips in frustration, and his cheeks flushed in anger. 

He was about to reply and tell him to fuck off when a yelp was heard.

Both sides turned their heads towards the noise, finding Roman to be the source of it. “Oh,” he said. “I’m sorry to… interrupt.”

Virgil’s eyes went wide as he took in the situation. He was pinned to the wall by a smirking Janus, his hair was ruffled and his face was red. Roman thought they-

Virgil hurtled away from Janus as if he had been burnt. “This is  _ not _ what it looks like.”

Roman opened his mouth as if he were about to say something, only to close it again. He nodded, slightly confused and still very much flustered. “Okay.”

Janus smirked, visibly amused. “Do you need anything else, my prince?”

•×××•

“I can’t stand him! He’s just there, in the way, and refusing to leave. And he’s so infuriating!” Virgil ranted as he paced. Logan flipped a page of his book and hummed absent-mindedly.

“He made me look so clumsy and dumb with the soup thing he did! Like, grabbing the plate  _ and _ me? And he had the  _ nerve _ to look fucking good while doing it!”

“Aha.”

“And he even grabbed my wrist later! Like, who does he think he is?!”

Logan snapped shut his book. 

“And did you pull away or tell him to stop?”

Virgil stopped pacing, shocked. “What?”

“When Deceit grabbed you by the waist, or by the wrist, did you tell him to stop?”

Virgil hesitated. “Well, I didn’t think I had to. I thought I had made it clear.”

“I’m sure you did. But next time, try asking him to stop and see how that turns out.” 

"That's not the problem, though," Virgil complained, and continued talking when he received a raised eyebrow from Logan. "I mean, the problem isn't so much him touching me as it is him making Roman think we're- we're  _ dating _ because of it. We used to live together, he knows my boundaries, but I thought I had made my  _ intentions _ with Roman clear."

"That's understandable. But I already gave you all the input I can give. Try asking him to stop."

Logan reopened his book and went on reading peacefully.

•×××•

“Virgil! You’re back!” Roman exclaimed happily as said side reopened the door of his bedroom.

"Yep, Princey. You're not getting rid of me that easily," Virgil replied, shooting Roman a lopsided smile.

Janus stepped forward. "So, what did Logan say?"

Anxiety pulled out the small box of pills Logan had given him, trying to ignore how his mind went elsewhere when asked about the logical side's advice. 

"He said Roman should take these if he has a fever, but I don't think he'll need them."

"Yeah, I'm feeling okay," Roman confirmed.

Janus approached Virgil, taking notice of how hard he was gripping the box. He lightly grabbed the back of Virgil's hand, turning it around. He smirked as he tried to open the other side's hand, to no avail. 

"What?" he asked with what Virgil thought was mockery, "I just want to leave the pills on the nightstand." He started tugging at one of Virgil's fingers, taking an unnecessarily long time to do so.

Virgil looked at Janus straight in the eye. "Stop." He saw Deceit's expression flicker to something not quite distinguishable for less than a second, before he took a few steps back.

Anxiety's mouth dropped slightly as he saw no sign that Janus would approach him again, to either make him look like an idiot or to touch him.

"Everything okay, Stormcloud?"

Janus turned to look at the side in charge of creativity. "Are you aware of the fact that you just called Virgil a floating mass of condensed water preceding rain, Roman?"

"Ah… yeah?"

Janus stared at him blankly for a second before smirking. "Awesome. It'll stick." Virgil spluttered.

"Why?"

Deceit looked at him. "Why not?"

Virgil crossed his arms and looked away. He was  _ not _ blushing again, mind you.

•×××•

"-AND I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE IT!"

Logan flipped a page of his book. "You can't believe Janus did what you  _ asked  _ him to do?"

Virgil exhaled dramatically. "I just… can't believe he actually did it."

"Aha."

"That's not something I expected Janus to do! Which is stupid because I knew he would! And I asked him to!"

"Why are you complaining, if you asked him to do it? Unless you didn't want him to stop."

"Of course I did!"

Virgil stopped pacing. There was silence for a second. 

"OH SHIT- I DIDN'T."

Logan didn't spare him a glance. He flipped another page.

Remus slowly raised from behind the TV.

"It sounds to me like Roman isn't the only side you want to fuck, emo." He made an eyebrow waggle.

"REMUS OH MY GOD-"

Logan waited patiently.

"OH MY GOD HE'S RIGHT!"

Logan raised an eyebrow, still not looking at Virgil.

"Not the fucking part, of course. Remus knows I'm ace. About the fact that I like Janus as well. When did that happen? How? Why? Why him? Oh my god no. Please no. It makes no fucking sense. Why  _ him _ ? Oh my god-"

"Virgil, you're rambling."

"Oh. Sorry."

Logan hummed.

"But why him? Out of all people, it just had to be Janus-"

"And Roman."

"And Roman- WAIT, YOU'RE RIGHT. WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO NOW?"

Logan gave up on his attempt to read and looked at Virgil tiredly.

"Do you still like Roman?"

"Yeah, I do"- Virgil crossed his arms, as if trying to shield himself from something- "But I also like… Janus. Or so it seems. And now I have to choose. How am I supposed to do that? It should be simple considering Janus is my sworn arch-nemesis-"

"A dramatic way of putting it."

"- but I still like him, y'know? For some reason."

Logan sighed. "Then fucking don't."

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Don't choose. You don't need to. Polyamory is an option," Logan said, as if he hadn't just made a mess out of Virgil's mind. "Polyamory is the practice of engaging in-"

"I know what polyamory is," Virgil said, his voice an octave too high. "But it would require  _ two _ people to like me. That's, like, impossible."

"Don't let them hear you." Logan set his book aside. "Alright, just look at the facts. Roman has shown signs of attraction for both you and Janus, including but not limited to, increased heart rate, nervousness, and distractedness. And Janus…" he was silent for a second. "Have you considered that perhaps he wasn't trying to make you look, as you said, 'like an idiot', or trying to get in the way of you and Roman, but that he was attempting to flirt?"

Virgil stopped in his tracks.

"What the fuck."

"They like each other. They like you. You like them. It's simple. The next step is to woo them."

But Virgil was still caught on what had been said earlier. "They- they like me."

He stared at Logan for three seconds, his mouth half-open in a disbelieving expression.

"Miscommunication is a bitch. I cannot deal with this bullshit."

•×××•

Virgil barged into the room.

"What is this that you fuckers (affectionate) like me?"

Roman said nothing as his face went red.

Janus opened his mouth, but it took a second for any word to come out. "Did you just say 'fuckers (affectionate)' out loud?"

"Not the point," he complained. "The point is that neither of you morons said  _ anything  _ about it. Was anyone gonna tell me that you had a crush on me or was I just supposed to find out because of Logan being done with my rants?"

"Are you going to stop talking through memes?"

"No."

"Okay."

Roman interrupted their exchange. "What?"

"Not gonna stop talking in memes anytime soon. I'd rather take the elevator to eeby deeby than stop."

"I'm not gonna question what you just said but I was asking about the  _ other  _ thing you said."

"About my ability to say 'fuckers (affectionate)' out loud?"

"No. I mean, yes, that too, but we'll discuss that later. I meant what you said about neither me nor Janus saying anything. Aren't you guys dating?"

Janus looked at Virgil, then at Roman, then back at Virgil.

"Ah, no?"

Virgil was simply done with life, with them, and also with their bullshit.

_ Fuck everything. _

"Nah, we weren't." He turned to Janus. "But we could, if you wanted to."

Caught off-guard by the question, Janus struggled to answer.

_ Actually, no. Not fuck everything. Oh no. _

Flight reflexes were about to kick in, but were cut off by Janus.

"Yes," he answered, trying to sound calm and collected, but his voice pitch betrayed his shock. "I  _ totally _ predicted you would ask me that. Everything was planned." He coughed. "Of course."

Although he had known about the other's feelings, Virgil hadn't known what to expect, and so was left speechless for a few seconds.

"And what about you, Roman?" he asked once he managed to get back his voice. Roman looked at him with a hopeful yet careful light in his eyes. Virgil looked at Janus for confirmation, and he nodded. "Would you join us?"

He hesitated for a second, his eyes flickering from one side to the other, before slowly giving his answer. "Yeah," he said. "I'd like that."

A genuine smile formed on Janus' face, just as Virgil's eyeshadow visibly changed color.

"Cool," he said, trying to act normal. "Cool. We'll make it work. I know we can."

"We will," Roman said. He looked slightly dazed still, but determined.

"Yes, we will," Janus affirmed.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it! Thanks for reading ♡


End file.
